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How to Tell Your Children That You Will Have a Plastic Surgery Procedure5 min read

Parents with their kid
Picture of Dr. Phillip Chang

Dr. Phillip Chang

Board Certified By The American Board of Plastic Surgeons.
Voted Top Plastic Surgeon in Loudoun, Virginia
Offices in Leesburg, Virginia.

Best of Loudoun 2019
real self top doctor virginia

So you’re ready for your plastic surgery procedure! You’ve talked to your doctor and nurse. You’ve scheduled your surgery, and you can’t wait to see the new you! In the midst of all the excitement, it’s important to take some time to discuss your surgery with your children – whether they’re toddlers or adults. The conversation doesn’t have to be awkward – especially since more and more women undergo plastic surgery. Here’s few suggestions on how you might address your upcoming plastic surgery with your kids. 

Consider Their Age and Gender

You should tailor the conversation with your children based on their age and gender. Older children will be able to understand more about the procedures and why you want to have them. And you might choose to adjust the details you share depending on your child’s gender.

How to Tell Your Young Children

While your younger children may not be able to handle details about the type of surgery you are having, they need to be aware that you will need a period of recovery afterward. You might explain it like a “boo-boo” or a “hurt.” 

You might also prepare your younger kids that you won’t be able to pick them up for a little while. You could excite them to help you with different tasks you normally do for them! Or let them know that another adult will help them with those things.

Your inability to pick them up can be tough for little ones to understand. It may be best to send them to spend the night with grandparents for a few days during your hardest days of recovery. When they are back home with you, let them sit beside you on the couch to snuggle. You’ll want to verbally and physically reassure them that you love them as much as you can.


What to Share With Your Daughter

Many moms worry they will send mixed signals to their daughters about body image. They think that their daughters will get the message that you have to change yourself to be beautiful. On the contrary, cosmetic procedures help with body positivity. 

Explain to your daughter that having surgery is very similar to going to the gym and working out in order to re-shape your body. Or, going to an orthodontist for braces to straighten out your teeth. 

The surgery will help you get results that you can’t get any other way. It’s to help you feel good about your body, fit into your clothes better, or be more confident. You are undergoing the procedure so you can be the best you can be.

What to Say to Your Son

Be honest with your son about your procedure, even if you are having breast augmentation. It may feel like an awkward conversation to have because breasts have been overly sexualized. However, if you communicate openly with him, he can ask questions without being embarrassed that he notices your larger chest. 

Sharing With Adult Children

Even if your children are adults, it’s important to tell them about your procedure. You wouldn’t keep any other surgeries from them, so why not share this? Likely, your grown children will be glad for you and excited that you are investing in your own happiness.

Mother and daughter image

Address Safety Concerns

As with all surgeries, there are risks involved. Your younger children will likely feel worried about you going to the doctor for surgery. They are concrete thinkers and perceive that going to the doctor means you are sick. Help them understand that you are going so that you can feel better. Going to the hospital can seem scary to them, so help them know what to expect if they see you in the hospital afterward. 

Explain What Your Children Should Expect After Surgery

Just like you need to know what to expect after the procedure, they need to know as well. They need to know what your limitations will be and how long you will be out of commission. You will need more help around the house, and they should be aware of your expectations for their increased contribution. If you have older kids, let them know you will need extra help with your younger kids.

Show Them You Are Healing

During the weeks after your surgery, show your children your incisions are healing. While you might avoid showing them fresh incisions, showing your kids incisions as they heal can help them that everything is ok and going well. 

Give them updates on how you are doing and let them know when you are able to pick things up again or do more. Otherwise, they may feel very concerned if they see you doing something that you couldn’t do right after surgery. 

Periodically Ask Them if They Have Questions

Keep the dialogue open between you and your kids. Ask them if they have any questions about your procedure or changes they see. If they are concerned about something or curious, this will give them the opportunity to ask. Once there are visible changes in your body, they will likely have more questions than they had at the beginning. 

You may even want to revisit the topic with them as they get older. It’s highly possible that your kids may consider surgery at some point in their life. If you are open with them, it will help them when they contemplate a procedure later on. 

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To find out more whether Aesthetica can help you, contact us online or at 703-729-5553 to arrange an appointment. Dr. Phillip Chang is a board-certified plastic surgeon in Northern Virginia near Leesburg, Virginia and an expert in a wide variety of cosmetic treatments.

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